In which we inquire about readers' gravitational preferences

Please answer the following question in the COMMENTS section below.
Haiku Farm and scientific inquiry worldwide appreciates your contribution to this survey.

As regards an involuntary dismount (also called a "dirt check" or a "gravity verification") I prefer to fall off my horse in the:
a. summer
b. winter
c. arena
d. mud
e. nude
f. presence of qualified medical personnel
g. other (please specify): __________________

because the:
a. ground is more hospitable
b. seasonally-appropriate clothes I'm wearing offer more protection
c. accompanying sound effects are so gratifying
d. story is sure to get me free beers for at least a week
e. audience makes everything so worthwhile
f. news crew will be sure to play the whole thing over again in slo-mo so everyone can appreciate my airborn acrobatic skills
g. other (please specify): ____________________


  1. (a) summer and (a) hospitable ground, plus (d) free beer. I hope you did not suffer a fall in the cold mud, but if you did, I hope it was incredibly dramatic and worthy of free beer.

  2. g never because I'm too old!

  3. g. Other: in front of two dozen of my students from school and their parents (two of which are teachers from school, and one of which is my principal)!
    g. Other: I get so much sympathy (and it gave my principal grounds to give me a hard time for months!)

    wv: "fashou" "Mud on one's butt... er, behind.... er, derierre, is such a fashou statement."

  4. I'd settle for b- winter and c- arena because a- the ground of a freshly raked arena is more hospitable and b- my winter riding jacket offers more protection. But, being me, I tend to come off in the summer, land on the only rock around for yards and I'm allergic to the free beers I get offered.


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